Episode 54: Personality Blueprint Part 5 – Know Your Values

Knowing your values makes your life easier. You are already living by your values subconsciously, but making them conscious helps you make better decisions, feel more confident, and create a strong self-image. 

This is one of my favorite exercises. 

In this episode, I explain why it’s useful to know your values and how to do that:

What: Our values are the guiding principles that give our lives meaning and determine how we live. Understanding your values can help you understand yourself and your motivations, however you still get to decide who you are.

Why?

Google search: (Psychology Today)

  • Reduce stress
  • Boosts decision making and problem solving skills
  • Inspire better habits
  • Help you act more assertively
  • Communicate with compassion
  • Bolsters confidence
  • Enhances intimacy
  • Help you find your purpose (lifehack.org)
  • Help clear out the clutter of life
  • Help develop a sense of self
  • Uncover where you are following someone else and where you are following your own path/desires.

How this has helped me:

Sense of who I am without shoulds or other people’s ideas.

Focused my efforts

Help me notice when I am acting from my intuition vs action from logic.

How to actually learn your values:

Website: https://personalvalu.es/
Or fill out my Values Discovery Workbook.

Questions to help you whittle your list of values. (Use these when you have your list of values down to 10-20.) Thanks to Kim Job for these ideas.
Imagine I have a magic values wand. It will give you what you want in the following questions, but it requires payment of one value that will no longer guide you.
1. Think back to a time when you really hurt someone. You can go back and make it right, but you must give up one (or more) of your values.
2. Think of a life decision you’d love to fulfill. Getting married, making a million dollars, buying a house, etc. This decision will be guaranteed with the wave of the magic values wand, but you must give up one (or more) values. Which value(s) do you let go of?
3. You can fully fund a charitable organization of your choice… for one of your values. Which value(s) do you let go of?
4. You can guarantee the health of a loved one… for the price of one value. Which do you let go of?
5. Which emotion do you most hate feeling? You will be guaranteed to never feel that emotion again, with the wave of the values wand, when you let go of one value. Which one is it?
6. You can bring someone you love back to life for one day. Which value do you exchange for this opportunity?
7. Have you ever wanted a superpower like being able to read minds, fly, or create fire? You can have it… for one value, which is it?

Download my Values Discovery Workbook below and you’ll be added to my email list (unless you unsubscribe- which you are totally welcome to!) and be the first to know about any upcoming opportunities to work with me using these personality tools. If you already know you want to get to know yourself better and work with me in that way, sign up for a free session (also below)!

Download my Values Discovery Workbook.

Schedule a free session.

Denita

Episode 52: Personality Blueprint CliftonStrengths

I have absolutely loved learning about my CliftonStrengths. I wish I would have discovered it sooner. Knowing my strengths has helped me to tailor my life, and especially my business, to me instead of trying to change myself to fit somebody else’s definition of success.

In this episode, I give an overview of the CliftonStrengths, explain why it’s useful to know yours, and outline my top 5 strengths as an example of what you will know and understand about yourself.

My top strengths are 1. Learner, 2. Restorative 3. Intellection 4. Input 5. Discipline. Tune in to find out what that means!

Useful links:
Learn more about taking your strengths test.
Get on my email list to be the first to learn about a new coaching opportunity relating to these personality frameworks.
Schedule a free session with me to talk through your strengths.

Episode 51: Personality Blueprint Part 2 – MBTI

Do you know what your Myers Briggs letters are? Do you even know what I’m referring to when I say that?

I learned my Myers Briggs type over 10 years ago and I’ve been learning more and more about it ever since. The Myers Briggs Type Indicator is one of the most popular tools in understanding your personality. It is a framework backed by decades of research.

My biggest understanding of the value of knowing my personality came when I typed my oldest child and realized for one of the letters, we were on exact opposite ends of the spectrum. Something clicked into place in my mind, and I started relating to her differently after that, and our relationship has been better for it.

I’ve also been able to drop much of the shame about who and how I am by understanding myself and how I am wired by default.

I hope you get a little glimpse of the same for yourself as I give you a big overview on the Myers Briggs Type Indicator. I am not an expert or an MBTI coach, but it is a tool that I love. Listen in to episode 51 to learn more, and hopefully be able to apply some of that understanding to your life today.

Denita

Helpful links:
Explore this site for technical and in-depth explanations
Check out this site to take a free test and more general explanations
Connect with me to find out more about this coaching offer
Go to my website to get on my email list or schedule a free session

Episode 41: Who Was There When You Got Hurt?

I was recently reading a book and a question was posed: Who was there when you got hurt as a child? This is an important question as I learn about attachment theory. I’m still at the very beginning of learning about attachment, so I don’t have much to share about that, but I almost burst into tears reading that question because I realized I felt emotionally alone when I got hurt or sick as a child.

I have a scar on my forehead from when I smacked my head on the corner of a coffee table when I was 2 years old.
I have a scar on my left knee from getting a liiiiiitle too reckless riding my bike one day.
I sprained my ankle in kindergarten.
I burned my thigh in or around kindergarten too.
I somehow got a splinter under my fingernail around age 13.
I sprained my elbow on my 16th birthday.

My mom was at almost every single one of these events for me. She attended to my physical needs– and was generally gentle and caring. But I still felt emotionally alone after these events.

This might just be my brain, or it might have been my mother’s limitations.

I hope I am better for my own children.

Do you feel like you were emotionally soothed?

Denita

PS. If you want to hear more of my thoughts that aren’t necessarily my stories, join my Heart-to-Heart notes HERE. Also, come play with me on Instagram if you play there.

Episode 36: A Moment of Self-Loathing

Today I’m getting really open and vulnerable by describing a moment when I was 14 and I really hated myself. I describe a tool you can use to help you go back to those moments and heal.

I’m currently enrolling for my new program School of Self. Email me at denita@denitabremer.com for more info.

Denita

Join my email list: https://view.flodesk.com/pages/612432bc9c07724f9bf1710c

Value Discovery https://view.flodesk.com/pages/605e89c25a1c0a274d9fb81f

Shame Proof Starter Guide https://view.flodesk.com/pages/5fb9d0327f165be8cd671c3c

Episode 30: Talking Too Much


If you’ve ever judged yourself for talking too much or having too many words, this episode is for you.

Listen in for

1.The time I gave a talk in sacrament meeting and spoke way too long.
2.Being like Hermione Granger
3.Leaning into it instead of pushing it down
4.Verbal processing

Thank you so much for filling out my survey:
https://forms.gle/KuCJeGxJyD7Lvimf9

Denita