In this episode, I talk about my relationship with my Dad and what I learned about who I want to be in the world from him.
This is the picture I referred to in this episode.
I was shooting for 40 life lessons on my 40th birthday, but I kept going and ended up with 78. Which of these do you like the best? Are there any you disagree with?
Trust and commitment are the missing links between YOU and GETTING MORE STUFF DONE.
In order to get anything done, you need one of two things: 1. commitment or 2. trust.
Most of us work off of unconscious commitments:
You brush your teeth every morning and night, because you are unconsciously committed to avoiding cavities.
You eat regularly because you are unconsciously committed to solving your hunger.
You stop what you are doing to help your kid because you are unconsciously (or consciously) committed to being a good mom.
You clean your house, at least to a minimum baseline, because you are unconsciously committed to avoiding the guilt or pressure that comes with having a messy house.
So you already do a lot. This is only a short possible list.
But you still have more stuff to do.
Stuff that seems to always get pushed to the bottom of the to-do list.
Stuff that you think you don’t really want to do.
Stuff that doesn’t NEED to be done, so it can be procrastinated.
Stuff that only matters to you– nobody else is going to do it or maybe even care if it’s done.
Stuff that requires decision making.
If you want to get THAT stuff done, you have to be able to trust yourself.
Either you have to bring these tasks into your conscious awareness and have commitment to doing them– which means anything that might come up to distract you from them becomes less important.
You make a plan for getting them done, and then you trust yourself to do it.
Reminder, trust means that you believe you will do what you say you will do.
When we don’t trust ourselves, we almost never follow through on getting the “extra” stuff done.
But in order to get that stuff done, we have to trust ourselves.
So it’s a catch-22!
Conscious commitment is how we get ourselves out of that loop.
And here’s the irony:
Building trust in ourselves leads to doing things over and over again, and then they become unconscious commitments.
So whether you want to get a big project done that you have been procrastinating, or you want to build healthier habits, trust and commitment are the keys.
If you want help with trusting yourself, getting more stuff done, or creating healthier habits I would love to invite you to join me on a free call where I can help you see where you are going wrong and some next steps to implement. Go to calendly.com/denitabremercoaching/convo to choose a time that works for you! I look forward to seeing you soon.
When we say, “I want to fulfill my purpose,” we often mean, I want to figure out what my purpose really is, and then act on it.
This implies that you don’t know what it is already, or that you don’t yet have a purpose.
Let me just make this really simple for you: Your purpose is to return to live with God someday. That’s it. That’s all. Are you doing what is necessary?
Awesome. Now what?
If you look up “purpose” in the topical guide, the first thing is says is “See also, Desire.” It also lists “Will” as an alternative to look into.
This makes me think that our purpose is just our desire, aka, our will.
Then if you check out all the scripture references below Purpose in the topical guide, desire can be replaced for each one, and it is enlightening:
Every desire is established by council.
A time to every desire under the heaven
This is the will that is desired upon the whole earth.
I could keep going, but you can check it out for yourself here.
I have heard it said by my coaching mentors, there are only two reasons why people hire a life coach:
I love that I get to help people discover and live out their purposes, their true desires.
And I love that it always starts with my faith.
If any of this resonates with you, I encourage you to meet with me for free. Let me help you figure out your purpose or how to live it. You’ll leave this free 60 minute session with a deeper understanding of yourself and some next steps. Sign up here.
In the meantime, go think about what you really want.
My personal struggle with self-worth.Continue reading