Signs that mindset work isn’t “working”
Before we get into the why, I wanted to mention a few signs that mindset work isn’t the appropriate route for the client:
- Going around and around in circles and never really getting anywhere.
- Always coming back to the same few places.
- Not feeling different.
- Using willpower to take action or stick to habits.
If any of these are the case, you might not be ready for mindset work.
I have a theory, at least at this point in time. I reserve the right to change it in the future!
Why mindset might not be the appropriate tool.
Some people come to self-help, self-development, coaching, therapy, etc to try to fix themselves. They are looking for an “out” to how they feel. These individuals most likely have a baseline of feeling unsafe, closed, reactive or helpless. When we are in this state, we need SAFETY. We don’t have the capacity to think about dreams and desires when we are just trying to get to safe.
The work for these individuals is nervous system regulation, emotion regulation, and building a foundation of safety. This includes becoming more resourced, so working on your fundamentals could definitely help in this stage.
When mindset is useful
Once safety is created, then, and only then, can the person move into creation, openness, and power. This is where mindset work is very useful.
If we try to use mindset work when we are seeking safety, we get nowhere.
Where are you? Open, safe, and creative or closed, unsafe and reactive? It’s ok you are where you are, it’s just useful to know what kind of work is right for you.
The goal is flexibility
You don’t get to one of these stages and then stay there permanently. We flow between these states. Sometimes we get stuck, in which case more support may be in order. Just because you feel safe now, doesn’t mean it will always stay that way.
Presence might be right for you
Creating a felt sense of safety is the work we do in my small group program, Presence. Set up a free call to see if joining is right for you.
Support for your fundamental habits
In 2024 I am working through eight fundamental habits and I invite you to join me. There will be email teachings and coaching calls about every three weeks. And the best part? It’s free! Sign up for more information here: https://denitabremer.myflodesk.com/fundamentals